DOPEY DANGLERS

 

Have you seen cars driving around with a CD dangling from the rearview mirror? Do you know why it’s there? Well, it will avert detection by speed cameras.

And if you believe that – as many drivers obviously do – then you’ll also believe in the Easter Bunny, Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, and that if you use a DVD instead, your car will actually fly!

However, the real problem with dangling a shiny CD from your rearview mirror is that it creates a massive blindspot. An area that could hide a double-decker bus from view as you swing onto a roundabout.

And that’s not good.

Furry dice and dream-catchers will do a pretty good job of making sure you run into something, too.

As for those air-freshener pine trees… it’s like trying to drive through a forest, dodging the trees, and “Wallop!” you get a cyclist.

A recent survey of paraphernalia that drivers are willing to use to create their very own blindspot includes: a Margaret Thatcher doll, baby shoes, a plastic horse and a leprechaun. I’ve even seen flags. It must be like driving through somebody’s washing line!

There is a US website that specialises in “rearview mirror ornaments” including something – I can’t quite decide what it’s supposed to be – that is big, furry, dangly and looks like a military sporran. I think it’s made from a squashed racoon or something. Anyway, it could easily block 3-lanes of stationary motorway traffic from the driver’s view.

And as for those fruit-loops that fill up their rear-parcel shelf with their entire soft toy collection, well… Call me old-fashioned, but I feel the need to know what’s thundering up the motorway behind me.

Now, I like a bit of a thrill and a slice of danger as much as the next person. But, do me a favour: ditch the dangerous danglers. Next time, it might just be me that’s hidden from view by your dopey ornament.

Drew McAdam

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